Author Interview + Giveaway: Toni Rae (I Dated This Guy Once)

We catch up with Toni Rae, author of I Dated This Guy Once… In a book that is part Eat, Pray, Love and part Sex and the City, Toni takes readers on her adventures in 21st Century dating and shares all that she has learned along the way with plenty of laughter, wisdom and points to ponder for the modern woman. 

Buy on AMAZON in both Kindle and Paperback:  http://www.amazon.com/Dated-This-Guy-Once/dp/1458211223

Questions for Toni Rae, author of I Dated This Guy Once…

1.    Tell us about your new book I Dated This Guy Once…

I Dated This Guy Once… is a memoir focusing primarily on going through the volatile years of ages 18-26 and how to navigate your decisions, your focus, your career and love life. The book is about instilling love where judgment exists, compassion where doubt exists and positivity into these years which can be sometimes dark and daunting. Growing up isn’t easy for anyone, especially not in today’s society.

2.    What was the defining moment that made you realise you wanted/needed to write this book?

I was laid off three times in about three years and decided to take the next job offer that presented itself, regardless of where or what it was. I took a job offer teaching English in South Korea, something I would never of even considered doing had the opportunity not came knocking on my door. The defining moment for me to write this book, and share my story, is because so many young people, at least 25,000 hired in Korea in 2008 alone, go through the exact same feelings and emotions I did. We all feel in search of something outside ourselves. I needed other young people to feel that they’re not alone.

3.    What are the key bits of advice that you want to share with others?

Dating in the 21^st century can be a real pain in the ass, but it is better than sitting at home eating bagels and feeling sorry for yourself. That’s one piece of advice. The other is just to love, love everyone and everything you surround yourself with. Sometimes one random act of kindness can change your tiny little corner of the world, so if you can’t change the world, change your little corner of it. Be a soft heart to a tough soul. Fall in love every day, with something or someone, but at the very least, fall in love.

4.    What are your thoughts about the modern way of dating, in particular online dating?

The modern way of dating, is as I mentioned, quite painful. With cell phone apps such as Tinder, Coffee Meets Bagel, OkCupid, Plenty of Fish, Skout and so on and so forth, you can pretty much meet anyone, anytime, with a quick swipe of a finger. It is unbelievable. But what has this done to communication and dating? It has made it less likely for a man to approach a woman traditionally, or even give a man the confidence and communication skills he must ascertain in order to actually facilitate a successful relationship. In other words, people aren’t communicating like they used to, everything is virtual. Online dating is a bit better than dating apps, because sites like Match and eHarmony match people with you in a systematic way regarding your personality and circumstantial expectations for a potential partner, which is obviously better than swiping left or right through photos of strangers on your cell over a beer at the local bar. Either way, I think online dating can be extremely successful, if you’re actually going on dates and putting yourself out there. Just simply getting out of the house should be your number one goal for finding the love of your life, unless you’re seriously considering a food delivery man.

5.    What do you think the future holds for dating?

That is a tough question. The future scares me a bit in the world of dating. We are already seeing our youth of society date and communicate differently. I was sitting next to this adorable 9 year-old boy at a squash match in a private club in Greenwich, CT a couple weeks ago. He was talking about his EX-girlfriend, yes a 9 year-old boy about an ex-girlfriend. Not only was he talking about her, come to find out, they had never actually met in person. They had friends at near by grade schools, met on facebook, started texting and video chatting and eventually broke up because they didn’t go to the same school. Okay, now I know you might be thinking, that’s not really that big of a deal. And maybe it’s not. But what sort of communication skills do you need, or could you possibly develop, carrying on a relationship via technology? That means that there is no personal or physical connection, just a virtual or emotional connection based primarily on looks. You could pretty much carry on an emotional relationship with any attractive person at this level, which scares me a lot, because emotions can be deceptive. So what do I think the future holds? Maybe a plethora of basic communication and dating skill classes? Your guess is as good as mine.

6.    Do you believe that there is someone out there for everyone?

I do believe there is someone out there for everyone who wants someone. There are definitely people in this world that are far better off being and staying single, and actually prefer it that way. Then there are the rest of us, who find love, desperately want to be in love, get married, and stay married. I am a hopeful romantic, and believe if you’re single, your soul mate could be right around the corner. Or he/she could be sitting in front of you at Starbucks, if you would just look up from your iPhone or Mac every once in awhile. I think the most important thing, is to always be present. Stop looking in the past, stop thinking of the future, and be present in every moment, then and only then will happiness find its way to you.

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There you have it, Toni Rae unveiled!

Buy on AMAZON in both Kindle and Paperback:  http://www.amazon.com/Dated-This-Guy-Once/dp/1458211223

On goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18602306-i-dated-this-guy-once

Buckle up, Toni Rae is giving away two hardbacks worth $30. Stand a chance to win one of them by entering this giveaway. Good luck.

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Blast From The Past Book Review Plus Giveaway: The Dating Game by Susan Buchanan

Available on: Amazon, Amazon UK

Blurb: Workaholic recruitment consultant, Gill McFadden, is sick of her friends trying to match-make for her. Up until now her love life has been a disaster and she’s going through a drier spell than the Sahara desert.

She realises she has to act, as work keeps piling up and at this rate she will have retired before she has time for a relationship.

Seeing an ad on a bus one day, she decides to visit Happy Ever After dating agency. She quickly discovers men are like buses. They all come along at once. Unsure what her type is, Gill decides to keep her options open. Soon she has problems juggling her social life as well as her work diary. Will she ever strike the right balance?

Before long she is experiencing laughs, lust and… could it be love? But like everything in Gill’s life, nothing is straightforward and she ends up wondering exactly who she can trust.

Dating has never been this variegated and fun, thanks to Susan Buchanan. It's the one book that would get you back in the game!

For Gill it's all about work. More work. Much more work. Running her own recruitment agency, her only social life might just be meeting with the girls for drinks. No time in her schedule for herself. No time for her parents. No time for Dating.

Mundane. In one word that's how you would describe her life (unless, her life it's a carbon copy of yours then you'd get touchy). Sex-deprived. In one compound word (for fancy's sakes) that's how you would describe her girly bits. Think back when you too been out of the game (I don't mean dating) for long, and you have Gill: unnerved, less relaxed, frantic. Then one day, you are strutting down the street, feeling all Carrie Bradshaw after nailing some major paperwork, all of a sudden a bus hustles by, then you have that Sex and The City moment you've been longing for. Of course, what were you thinking! You don't see yourself on the bus (unless you own a sex column), you run a recruitment agency for fucks sake! What you see is a poster advertising a Dating Agency for professionals like you. You jump at it because it beats OKCupid (and even Facebook, you desperate ladies out there. I don't judge, the best lovers are first friends), say bye bye to all those weirdos that have come your way to try something with very refined people.

Until the profiles keep piling from the agency. Then you are going on dates that are interfering with your professional life. Karaoke, bowling, free dinners, free drinks, free lunch, art galleries, a Scottish wedding. For you it's all worth it because the hefty subscription fee could cater for a new wardrobe spilling with designer labels. For your friends it's all fun because you get to have more time discussing suitable profiles and not so suitable ones over drinks and dinner, noting down the red flags and the brownie points.

Then shit! You find out the world's biggest assholes hide in suits. By then you are in too deep, wondering why that guy isn't calling. Didn't he have as much fun as you did? When he doesn't call you hit rock bottom, struggle to pick yourself up. Finally you do. After all, these profiles don't date themselves!

That's just The Dating Game. You freshen up, strap on your Louboutins and move on.

This book was amazing! So true to life! It's one of those books both the storyline and the main character are relatable. I mean 9.5 out of ten women have dated. A lot of women past thirty are single (please, I do mean it in a good way. Cheers women! Who needs men anyway!). Anyway, we all know the Dating Game is hard. All the fretting over what outfit to wear, 'Oh, will this guy love it if I touch up with too much makeup?', the 'Is he enjoying this as much as I am?', "No, kissing on the first date", "Oh, why didn't he kiss me? Did I have something stuck between my teeth? Or do I have BMO?—" *smell check* "—No, I don't!". So fun how Susan Buchanan captures it all, not leaving a snippet.—★ Oh, and lest I forget, "Does my purchasing a new set of lingerie mean we might be getting it on tonight?"

Gill was just a plus character. You know, I just found out Susan names her chicklit, 'Chicklit without the fluff." . Yeah, the genre is prone to many airheads we chicklit lovers know, but Gill's got the brains, the looks, the boobs. She's about the only chicklit character who'd agree she's hotter than a close friend. And as if that isn't enough, she's independent! Just like you when you were thirty-seven!—★★

Don't you love just UK chicklit?—★★★ Anyway, that's not the point here.

The characters in this book are so, so, entertaining! You remember all the funny dating stories you relate to all your friends? Well, Gill has a lot of funny, weird, wolf in sheep's tailored suit to relate to you. There's Charlie, the nice-looking, buffed guy with a hidden agenda, Sean who gets plastered during a first date, Anton(!) the guy who'd ask whether he can kiss you, Gary who would take you from surprise to surprise yet you feel no spark, so much more! For if not Gill's friends, she would have ended up choosing the terrible profiles, so you would love Angela, Lisa (Raarr!), Debbie. All these with their discussions on who to date made this book a fun experience in the journey through dating!—★★★★

Gasp. You would, a lot! There are lots of Oh Moments of Gee, and you will be so shocked you are never going to see it coming. Frankly, you will feel sorry for Gill because sometimes you might have two choices. And all these two are incredible lovers. All these two give you the spark. So who would it be? It's a win-win with every choice. It's a lose-lose with every choice.

But I did love the ending, the whole book as a matter of fact! It was the kind that would make you sing Natasha Beddingfield's Pocket Full Of Sunshine all along.

My rating: 5/5 stars

Dating Game, your handbook through all the woes of Dating is available on Amazon and Amazon UK .

Or? Do you stand a chance of winning it?

Here?

Susan is giving out two digital copies of The Dating Game, enter now!

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I recommend this book to anyone who wants to get back into the Dating game or not! Anyone who wants something or someone they can sympathize and relate to. Anyone who wants something true to life. This book kinda reminded me of Zoe Strimpel's 'What The Hell Is He Thinking?', you know the Woman's guide to Dating/relationships/all the brouhaha. So if you've read that, Gill is simply acting out Zoe's dating horrors.

My work not done here. Off to post my review on Goodreads as well as Amazon.